Albanian writer and artist Besa Myftiu sparked surprise some time ago when she revealed that she and her Swiss husband are now living in an open marriage.
Occasionally, they fall in love with other people, yet they remain together, sharing in each other’s joys and heartbreaks over these relationships.
For Besa Myftiu, this arrangement seems natural, as nothing in her life conforms to traditional “Albanian norms.”
In an interview, she opened up about her open relationship:
“My husband and I can live our own lives; we even live in different cities. After 20 years, things change… We’re like friends, so there’s no problem if one of us falls in love with someone else. On the contrary, we’re happy for each other.”
This open relationship hasn’t diminished Besa’s love for her husband. She believes he has never wronged or hurt her, even when he has feelings or relationships with other women.
“I still love him, but love changes; it becomes something different. We were in love for many years. I’m always the first to notice when he’s in love with someone else—me and Elina. I’m the first person he tells. Who else would he tell? It has happened that he’s had relationships, and I’ve felt just as upset as he has when those relationships ended. When you love someone, you want them to be happy—with whoever and however they choose.
We’re both happy in our own cities. Why should I legally separate from him? What has he done to me? We love each other and stay together like brother and sister. Practically speaking, this is what happens to most couples in Albania, but they just don’t say it.
We celebrated our 25th wedding anniversary, which, for us, is more of a social contract. We’re perfectly fine as we are,” Besa Myftiu concluded.
